RUOK?: There’s more to it than you know.
Dia, Peer Support Leader, Grade 6
3 December 2024
Most people know about RU OK Day, which happens on the second Thursday of September each year. At UWCSEA, the whole community gets behind this day to raise awareness of mental health and peer-to-peer support. RUOK Day promotes ALEC, a formula for checking in on friends and colleagues.
Here is a rough version of the steps, in case you don’t know:
The ALEC process of ‘RUOK?’ is straightforward and easy to follow, almost foolproof, right? But, look closer at the Encourage Action part. ‘If you are still unsure or worried, tell a trusted adult.’ That can be very intimidating for some kids.
There are many other articles that support this. For example, Stanford Medicine Children’s Health says, “One of the developmental tasks of adolescence is to separate from one's family as one becomes an independent young adult. During adolescence, teens start to realise that their parents and key authority figures don’t know everything or have solutions to all types of struggles. As adolescents become more independent from their parents, they are more likely to turn to their peers for advice.”
So in the context of “RUOK?” put yourself into the position of being asked, “Are you okay?” Would you tell the enquirer the real problem, or just reply with something like, “ I’m good.”, or “Yeah, I’m fine.” This will probably not lead to the conversation you’re hoping for. So what do we do about it? How do we ensure that students are really feeling ok?
Fun fact!
Did you know that students are more likely to talk about what they are going through with their peers rather than with adults?
A quote by the researchers of Australia’s Murdoch and Griffith universities says:
Being among peers during times of stress may offer adolescents an open, supportive and rewarding space which may help dampen the emotional turbulence that adolescence can bring.
Enter a team of volunteer peer-to-peer student support leaders. The Peer Support Leader concept was first suggested by Ms. Adilah Mohamad Abu Bakar (better known as Ms. Khan), one of the Middle School advisory teachers in UWCSEA. She created a class committee, and two of the positions are Peer Support Leaders. But how does it work?
During the advisory class, the teacher will conduct a voting session and students can only vote once! One to two Peer Support Leaders will be elected, and students are asked to choose people who they think will do a good job and have shown empathy, as well as open-minded thinking. The student vote is final.
Of course, the elected Peer Support Leaders will have to take up the necessary responsibilities. They will receive training once a month from their advisory teacher, and will have some projects to do.
The Peer Support Leaders will keep everything confidential, unless, of course, it could potentially harm someone else or themselves. If a student does come to them with something like that, the PSL will immediately contact the advisory teacher. The role of the Peer Support Leader is not to be confused with the role of the Designated Safeguarding Leads or the school counsellors.
I think that having Peer Support Leaders in Middle School is very important for many reasons.
- Firstly, students will feel heard, and part of a community. They can confide in someone they trust, and having Peer Support Leaders also align with the UWC skills and qualities. This is because it will help students to become more open-minded and empathetic.
- Secondly, there are things in the school that the adults may not be aware of initially, for example bullying. The Peer Support Leaders can offer support because, as I mentioned before, kids are more likely to talk to their peers than adults at first. The Peer Support Leaders will be there to listen and support, and they can ask for help from a trusted adult if it is needed.
- The Peer Support Leader concept can offer parents and guardians some reassurance that their child has a trusted peer to talk to, someone who can understand what challenges they are facing as they are in the same year and advisory class as them! This is especially true of those kids who have just moved from Junior to Middle School – that is a big step.
- Peer Support Leaders are also with their mentor groups every day! This daily peer-to-peer engagement gives them a chance to meet and talk with one another and make sure that they are getting along well. They may also notice when someone is acting differently, for example is withdrawn or stressed.
Having an outlet to discuss concerns will also help teachers and others in the class and mentor group. Kids can lift the burden of carrying their worries on their own shoulders and this should help them remain focussed in class as well.
We all have a part to play in making this world a better place and part of this is to care for and support one another. Our school mission is to make education a force to create a peaceful and sustainable future. To make that possible, we need a united school. Kurt Hahn envisioned UWC as a safe haven for all those who believe in the UWC mission, no matter where they come from, or who their family is. A place of quality and unbiased education for the future generations.
With mental health wellbeing becoming more and more important by the day, there is a great opportunity for Peer Support Leaders to contribute to a sense of belonging and wellness. We are the future generation, and we are the spark that lights the fire, and that makes a difference in the world. We represent many cultures and religions from all over the world. But although we may all be different, we all are here to make this world a better place.
But in order to make this wonderful goal come true, we first need to have good mental wellbeing, and appreciation and gratitude for the things around us. There is so much good in this world and we see it every day, in life, love, and compassion. Let’s not let go of our courage and hope too soon, and let all the beauty fade away. We are United World College, and with one small flutter of kindness, we can make a cyclone of change.